How's the DATING thing working for ya?

For what it's worth, because of your situation, I was clear that I wouldn't do anything physical with her until she got an STI test. So, thanks.

It's a good idea for both people to get tested before getting physical, but the test for herpes is unreliable unless there are also visible sores. Checking the CDC site today, I see that the Trump Administration has made some changes, including deletion of estimates of how prevalent herpes is in America. According to the John Hopkins site, more than half of all American have HSV-1, and possibly 1 in 6 have HSV-2. It's hard to be certain, because 80% of the people with HSV have never had an outbreak.

The only good thing about herpes is that the outbreaks are mild and only slightly painful, and their frequency decreases over time. There is medication that can reduce the chance for outbreaks and transmission, but it has potentially severe side effects like liver damage and kidney failure. So I don't take the medication, and still feel fine about 42 out of 52 weeks in the year.